LOVE CHANGE

I love change. I love it when the pain in my back changes to no pain.  I love it when the seasons change and we get different weather. I love it when laws are changed and people who love each other have the freedom to marry whomever they desire.   

I love change, except when I don’t.  I don’t like it when the laws that protected the voting rights of millions of minorities are struck down. I don’t like it when someone suffers because of the change in the economy.  I hate change when my sister was living and now she is dead. 

Freud suggested that being human is to love what we hate and to hate what we love.  Guess by this description I am human. 

But, regardless of whether or not I love or hate certain changes, the fact is I must learn to live with it.  I can try to grab onto what I love and keep it from changing.  And when it changes, I can hang onto the memory of the way things were.  I can attach myself so tightly to the way things were that I am create a prison made of the remains of that which has changed. 

Or, I can learn to live with change.  I can forgive the past for changing and find mercy for those who are responsible for the changes. I can open my heart to the possibility that there is something in the changed reality which I can celebrate.  I can try to imagine a new way of living in the absence of the way life was before. 

This seems to be important work if I want to flourish in my future.  My future is emerging from the changing of my  life the way it now is.  If I open my heart to it’s possibilities, maybe I will discover blessing.

DENYING GOD'S DESIRE FOR FUTURE

[This post is the sixth in a series of devotions on forgiveness that I first published last year in a leaders’ devotional book, "Disciplines 2013" from The Upper Room. This is based on a reading found in II Corinthians 5:18-21]

God loves creation.  Divine life creates the world and declares it good.  All creatures are gifts of God.  God ‘s love is attentive and enjoys being in right relationship with the created order.  God creates partners with whom to discover the way life can be lived fully and faithfully.  God’s goal is the reign of God on earth as it is in heaven.

Therefore, God is committed to not holding our sins against us. In Christ, that is, through mercy and forgiveness, God acts to reconcile us with each other and with the divine will.  God’s agenda is to break down the walls of pain and injustice that divide us from the good that was created.  God has chosen those who claim Christ as Lord to be partners or ambassadors for Christ in the creation of a new world that reflects the divine desire of justice and mercy.

That new world will be different from the previous one. Our experiences, our mistakes, our discoveries, our achievements and failures will all be taken into the Divine heart through “the one who knew no sin” and will give shape and form to the new world that is being created.  Because God returns to us and does not hold our mistakes against us, we can be bold in our living, trying and failing, picking ourselves and each other up and trying again.  The future world of a reconciled people keeps calling us forward into new action. 

When we allow the mistakes, the hurt and pain of past offenses to capture us and create prison bars to keep us away from a new and reconciled future, we deny God the insights of our experience. We are kept from offering ourselves, broken and incomplete, for the service of God’s design.  Therefore, receiving Divine forgiveness is the devotional imperative of those who seek to follow Christ.  Are you open to be free to join God in an innovative future of grace and justice?

Beloved of all, take our hands and walk with us into your divine future.  

SUCH A LITTLE LIFE

One of the problems with the future is that it does not exist. It exists only in our imaginations. The future is an empty space. We fill it with our imaginations. The future is what we think it is in our minds.  When the future comes, it no longer exists.  It has become the present. It is no longer empty space with images of what we think, but it is what is actually happening.

What we imagine may not become real in the present. Imagination and what materializes do not always match. But what does happen is that what we imagine about the future has a significant influence how we live in the present. What we think the future holds will pretty well determine what we do with our time today.

So, our real question about the future is, "What do we fill that empty space with?"  

One thing we fill the future with is scary images. We create horror stories. What can go wrong? What can happen to hurt us? What will my children do that will be dangerous? What will happen to the economy?  We can "awfulize" the future.  This helps us by alerting us to dangers. We do this to protect ourselves from unpleasant surprises. The ability to imagine unpleasant eventualities keeps us on our toes.

But, to live there is to live in constant fear. To fill the empty uncertain future with thing that threaten us and scare us leads us to hide from life. Or, as Shirley Valentine said in the movie of that same name, "I've lived such a little life." Living in fear shrinks our lives.

Since the future is empty and we can fill it with our imagination, what would happen if we filled it with images of blessing and goodness?  What if we leaned into that space with the courage to love and embrace what shows up in that space? What if we expected life to offer us grace rather than judgment?

Well, we can be sure to be disappointed. For when we imagine good it might not happen. But, imagining good opens the eyes to seeing it. Imaging shapes what we look for.  It might contribute to the good actually materializing. To imagine life as an adventure of discovery opens us to "live large."

I don't know how tomorrow will turn out. But, I do know that the images I project into the empty space of the future can help me live with more or less fear. And I do know that love has power to, if not eliminate fear, at least put it in it's place. 

VITALITY

Holidays are times when vitality can be deeply experienced.  But for that to happen, we have to watch that frozen moments don't steal the energy.

Holidays are such opportunities because vitality is intensified when three ways of experiencing life merge.

Memory is central to living.  Memories are experiences we hang on to and use to make meaning in life.  What we remember and how we weave together those remembrances help us know where we came from and who we are.  Memories are fluid and constantly flow along, collecting new experiences to reshape our self-understanding.  Holidays are filled with memories.

But, sometimes memories get frozen.  Sometimes we cling so desperately to the faded summer that memories can become a prison.  We get locked into the past that we created in our minds and can't be open to the present that is our life now.

Presence is also a powerful force in a vital life.  Holidays are filled with presence.  They are filled with food and music, with parties and people. Holiday experiences are focused occasions when we embrace the physical things around us,  We are sometimes overwhelmed.  All these come together to create experiences that help us know where we are and who we are.

But, sometimes we can be so immersed in the present that we lose track of yesterday's gifts.  We lose touch with the rich soil of the past that make the present possible.  Prayer is a pause that invites us to keep in touch with the long-view--to not be so absorbed by the moment that we lose its meaning for our lives. 

Vitality in life is also enhanced when anticipation is present.  Each moment leans forward.  The future and how we imagine it gives energy to our lives.  Holidays are times when we prepare and anticipate, dreaming of what is possible and working to make our dreams come true.

But, sometimes we are so driven by our need to fill that future with our vision that we miss the gifts that come as a surprise.  We don't see gifts of grace because we are frozen by our image of what grace ought to be.  We are so busy making the future look like what we think it should that we don't allow ourselves to experience the presence of love in the moment.  We are so consumed by activity to fill the future that the soil of our past can't hold us and give us a place of rest and peace.

Memory, presence and anticipation--all important parts of being alive.  Allow them to flow together during the holiday time.  Rest in good memories, embrace present moments, anticipate gifts of tomorrow.  Let them all flow together to enrich your holiday.

CHURCH GROWTH AND GRIEF

This came from a friend. I find that I disagree with the premise of Mr. Anderson. Grief is not killing the church--our fear of grieving is killing the church. My colleague Bernie Lyon and I will publish a book in April, 2012 "How to Lead in Church Conflict: Healing Ungrieved Loss" (Abingdon) and in that book we define grieving as "learning to live again in the absence of someone or something significant." Conflict over the future is grounded in our fear of what we will lose in the future. Our assumption is that grieving well is the way to move forward toward the world that God is creating.  Churches who embrace the future are ones that are able to name their losses and pain, express their anger over the loss of their identity, remember well enough that the past is memorialized and human, confess their guilt and shame and embrace the forgiving grace of God that frees them to move forward.  Then grateful hearts are freed to imagine and play with new  possibilities and the church can not only vision a new future but can access the energy to move toward it.  The future is grounded in the soil of the past and grieving is the way churches discover the germinating seeds that will become their future.  Our advice is therefore that congregations grieve their losses as a way of welcoming the future.

How do you think grief effects the vitality of church growth? 

 http://www.churchleadership.com/leadingideas/leaddocs/2011/110817_article.html